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A Name upon my Tongue

I watch so silently, from afar,
unable to ever look away
for I have discovered
the apple of my eye.
My mind, it wishes for something
that shall never come to pass
as my heart trembles and then collapses,
fearing my feelings shall become a scar
upon my bleeding, wretched soul.
It is yours, but then so am I,
and yet even with this writ, never will you know the truth.
You may like me, maybe even perceive me as a friend,
perhaps, but love me? Now that is something you could
never do, something you will never ever do
because I am not the man one falls for,
and I am not your future destiny.

I dream of a luscious kiss being brought
from your tentative lips onto mine
in a moment of brief happenstance.
I hold you, I touch you, I feel you;
your beautiful hair; your beautiful face; your beautiful body;
your beautiful spirit, caressing me and setting fires
upon my soul. Your physical feminine form
perplexes me and wounds my able defences
as an unshakeable trance becomes my soul.
I am trapped before your delicate embrace.
I am your servant. I am your slave. I am forever yours;
please, my young gorgeous darling, do with me whatever you will,
and I shall respond in kind, for I must be told by your heart
the endeavours I must do, else I fear I will not survive.
I have not once in my short life ever fallen for anyone like this; this is new, and has never happened to me,
just like this will never happen to you. But who dare desecrate the beauty of this moment; for Jamie is perfect.

Even if I cannot in reality touch you,
feel you, kiss you, hold you, or share a moment with you
I will hold onto these great feelings for you
until I can hold onto them no more.
I do not wish to do away with them
but this inevitable conclusion
I know awaits me, on the other side of yesterday;
it is simply yet to catch up with me, just as this young
fool is yet to be captured by it. I shake my head strongly
at the thought of not being with you in the upcoming future,
for what is this life of mine, if I am unable to live it?
Why is this stubborn heart in my chest if it cannot beat for you?
Why must I be burdened with these feelings
if a relationship is not allowed?
Listen; I know my place in this society of ours, and it shall never be positioned beside you my love.
If I ever do confess my feelings, please; let me down as hard as possible, so I might fall and break my heart.