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Undelivered Feelings

The silence spoke volumes
I didn’t know existed
when these undelivered feelings
coursed through me. Though the ending
retained a sense of predictability,
my eyes refused to witness
the brutality of unwavering honesty,
the tender touch of my agenda
restraining the hopelessness
often applied to romance.

Always, I try frenetically
to grasp that which shines the brightest,
only to continuously return
with empty hands and bludgeoned heart,
to an existence
seemingly more meaningless
than before. Though you are a beauty
of utmost arousal, you are a cactus,
whose spines thwart the undeserving masses
with unequivocal poison,
my heart wanting to retain its warmth
than face the solace-less alone.

So, I hide within myself, malcontent
yet absolute, certain this tragedy
will provide a conclusion, better sustained
than what would have been.
With able mind I realize,
I will not risk your face,
so beautiful now,
turn into a scowl
the moment I reveal my feelings.
If this decision renders accusations
regarding confidence
and cowardice wrought against me,
then these slanderous remarks
I will regrettably suffer
without dismay, for I acknowledge
my deserving of these titles,
and I own this hesitation.

If only a sign, so subtle,
but immediate and paramount
could be issued, granting me allowance
to whether you were open
to love’s flame,
or wanted it blown out.
Despite the combustion of atoms
retaining less potency
than my love for you,
to some, romance is a horrific poison,
but even so, I would devour every drop
for you alone, if only to spend eternity with.

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Metropolis Me

SYNOPSIS: About the rekindling of a friendship that incorporated romanticised feelings after so many years of being apart, and the wish that this friendship could grow into something much more powerful and everlasting. The man in the story is broken to some extent, and whether this be physical or emotional is up to reader discretion.

You were born in north east Victoria, raised in Sydenham;
fell in love at age fourteen to a young man from north Melbourne.
Four years later that dream was over, he didn’t give love a second chance
and then you went to college where you studied gymnastics, drama and dance.
It was in that same year the both of us happened to meet so suddenly,
you were the smart attractive student, whilst the opposite was played by me.
When we met, the two of us were complete and utter strangers,
but inside my heart I felt such extraordinary changes.

When we first met and I told you my feelings, I could have instead not said a word,
but my heart, it said to me ‘I will not allow these strong feelings to go unheard.
I would spend my life forever in your arms if given the choice,
moreover, I would do almost anything just to hear your voice.
One hundred is the number of days since last I laid eyes on your pretty face,
one million is the number of times I’ve thought of you since we met in that place.
I have thoughts of you, constantly, running throughout my mind,
true love together, in the future, we could one day find.

However, such written words, without action, are almost meaningless,
without the actual emotion they could never truly impress.
That is why I ask if we could meet up tomorrow yet again
and rekindle that age old flame, whilst making jokes with an old friend.
I may seem incredibly young, but I am not emotionally weak,
all of these thoughts and feelings I have buried inside me, I wish to speak;
and so instead they are typed up, in a badly written love poem,
it’s described this way for I’ve never written one with heart, soul and solemn.

Inevitably, only a stubborn fool could believe in love;
a fool I must be for falling for an angel from up above.
Intense, powerful and passionate emotions could easily begin
the moment I touch, taste and smell your divine and lusciously silky skin.
Immediately after this occurrence we could make true love for the first time,
an occurrence that for me, would be forever unto eternity; sublime.
Nothing could be better as I dance inside you; within your secret garden,
with its hydrated rainforest canopy and continuous seduction.

If you chose to live by my side I’d never need to have happiness or wealth,
yet another of the many things I wanted to accomplish for myself.
There have been so many things I’ve wanted to do which have been barred from my life;
I wanted to settle down, make a child; a daughter and have you as my wife.
Instead, I believe I can say without a flickering shadow of a doubt,
that you will never know how I feel for you until this life of mine runs out.
I wish when they spoke about ‘forever’ they’d be talking about us; me and you,
there is nothing else in this world I would ever dream of committing myself to.

When I look into the mirror, a broken man is all I ever see,
I wish you could bear witness to the romantic places inside of me.
I doubt you’ve ever seen my face for it’s hidden behind a mask of emotions,
if you don’t want to see me again just tell me and I’ll obey your instructions.
I’ll admit, I don’t want to remove from my heart someone who has left such a mark,
for when we first met you came to me like the brightest light in the gathering dark.
In truth I want to provide to you all the love in my heart and soul,
I believe I’m to be the man whose destiny is to make you whole.

Without you I am lost within the boundaries of the twilight zone,
I am exactly like that old dog who has lost his favorite bone.
All of the things that we have done we can always undo,
however, the one thing I would never replace – is you.
I am yet to realise if it’s you or my mind that I am losing,
if I don’t have you in my life it will be my heart that I’m abusing.
Inevitably I should use my heart before it is ground up into dust,
before I die I hope to give it to you; the only woman whom I lust.

All I have to give to you are these three words every day and night;
if only such words could constantly fill you with ravishing delight.
I do not have a million dollars, nor do I have handsome looks,
I could never provide to you the fairytale inside children’s books;
I do not have a luxurious car, nor do I have an amazing career;
could you ever sleep beside and love such a person? I don’t think you could I fear.
If you were to suddenly turn away and leave I would be forced to ask you ‘why?
Have I not tried to give you everything?’ I would ask, as I began to cry.

I wish you could stay with me tonight to watch this life of mine unfold
and experience together the greatest love story never told.
However, we are constantly separated by forests, rivers and seas,
I cannot wait for you to one day return back home once more and marry me.
I dream of such an occurrence transpiring almost every single day;
I wish love could quit wearing a disguise and instead transform into a foray.
So please, tie your long hair back, put your perfume on and make your face look just so pretty
and then meet me, your man always and forever, in your local suburban city.