Monster Heart

I may have been born
and raised by humans,
but I was never one of
them. I am alien, as I
always was; I am Clark
Kent without the power,
E.T without the family to
go home to. I almost look
human and can therefore
almost assimilate physically,
but always there was
something missing; a
necessary component of
humanity I was always
deprived; love? I had that
once, but now that time was
over. I could hope for it
again, but do little else.
Empathy? I could sympathise
with those in pain and
sometimes wish they weren’t;
I could relate to the loss and
potentially even cry for them,
but I could do little else. Speech?
I could at times be quite
garrulous despite my normally
silent demeanour. Anxiety?
A necessary evil it would seem;
a burden I did not wish to carry;
the part of humanity I wish
I had been denied. Anger, fear,
hatred, happiness; the list could
go on and on. So what is it that I
had been denied; what had I been
forsaken; what was not my
birthright? Can you guess? It was
as forgettable as a pebble, but as
important as the human heart; the
essence of humanity. Barred from
me like a prison, without which I
was not quite myself, I instead
became something less than I
ought to become. I was as
hideous as a nightmare; as
unloved as a cockroach; as
unwanted as a tax bill. I
was an insidious monster
that very few people could
ever see past. This was no
mask which could be taken
down, it was beneath the skin,
burrowing deeply into the
lower reaches of my soul. My
gift for being birthed I do
presume and it made me wish
that I hadn’t, but all it would
take is one touch; one kiss; one
sign of lust from a fair damsel
to remove this burning pain from
my interior. Like a frog’s first
kiss, I would finally feel alive
once more and perhaps, if luck
may have it, I would take my
first step into a human world
and maybe even enjoy it; and if
I didn’t? Well, I guess I’d just
ask the fair angel to kiss me
again and I would immediately
be the man I ought to be once
more, with the queen of the
human spirit standing, perhaps
happily, by my side. And they
say monsters cannot have dreams?

Advertisements

About totalovrdose

I am an online journalist, video game reviewer, mental health advocate and post graduate university student. I am a massive video gaming geek; a lover of intellectual conversations; an award winning procrastinator; a devilishly charming nuisance and the definition of 'fun' (sometimes). My blog is filled with many a soporific love poem, and is simply the beginning in my quest to become a published author. Please stop by and say 'Hi!' (that rhymes!) :D

Posted on June 26, 2013, in Poetry and tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink. 4 Comments.

  1. Wow….very intense ride you wove….

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: